We don’t need no Spam

There are times when you really hated spammers. Here are some replies to them.

Dear Spam Sender,

Thank you for taking such an interest in me. I regret to inform you the following:

My penis is just fine, but thank you for asking.
I don’t own a home, so why the fuck would I need to re-finance my mortgage.
I don’t require any medication and even if I did I wouldn’t buy it from someone who can’t spell the name of it.
I deeply regret your situation in Nigeria (or whatever 3rd world country you and “your millions of dollars you need to transfer” live in) but you’re barking up the wrong tree.
I already have a degree (again, last time I checked you didn’t spell diploma with a 1 in the middle).
Posing to be the institution I do my banking with, wow, that’s fucking admirable. No, you can’t have my account information.
Re: I don’t remembering sending you e-mail in the first place.
“Your PC is infected”. No it isn’t, I have a Mac which doesn’t open your fucked up .exe files, you stupid.
Thanks for the stock tip, unfortunately I didn’t see a listing on NASDAQ for: bL06Wjob GraNNy99.
Chicks banging horses is soooo 1999.

Bye for now,
Brajeshwar

Brajeshwar posted this article on Mon, Apr 2nd, 2007 at 4:45 am
Categorized under General and has the following tags

Comments Post Yours

There are 14 responses so far. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

DannyT April 2nd, 2007 at 5:43 am 1

So you would like to satisfy her for longer, Are interested in new Adobe and MS Software and actually have won the uzbekistanian lottery?

Great post dude!
Avinash April 2nd, 2007 at 7:03 am 2

Hahahaha A good dose of laughter!

A few days ago, I left a comment on PhotoMatt that even spammers are creative. Sometimes, when I check my spams, I feel like laughing.

But now a days, these spammers are pissing me off by sending 100s of adult spam links/day. Grr

- Avi
Ritesh Jariwala April 2nd, 2007 at 5:01 pm 3

Brajeshwar…good answers.

I will suggest you to use CAPTCHA in your word press comments. I was facing a problem regarding spam by comments in my blog..and i installed CAPTCHA, really saves my life.

Try any CAPTCHA plugin in your comment.
Anita April 3rd, 2007 at 7:23 am 4

Haha … what a great list. ”My penis is just fine, but thank you for asking.” - I would love to reply to them and say “When I get my first penis, you will be the first person I contact”. But, then I realize I’d just receive more penis spam, so I get no such joy.
Wolfgang April 5th, 2007 at 2:55 am 5

Hi Brajeshwar,

great post, rotfl.

I would suggest to send this text within the forwarded spam-mail to the webmasters, administrative contacts, and registrars of each spam-promoted website! Even if the contact details in the records are faked, the registrars are real and have to deal with. If thousands do so immediately when receiving spam, I bet, all these sites will be off next day.

greez
Brian April 5th, 2007 at 9:35 pm 6

Good post, i feel the same way!
Jitendra April 5th, 2007 at 11:24 pm 7

From where did you copy these lines and pasted on to your blog…?
Katalog Stron September 26th, 2007 at 4:24 pm 8

would love to reply to them and say Ã¢â�¬Å�When I get my first penis, you will be the first person I contactÃ¢â�¬Â�.
nagrobk November 2nd, 2007 at 6:40 pm 9

Spam is Good
borelioza January 6th, 2008 at 1:09 am 10

From where did you copy these lines and pasted on to your blog
Brajeshwar January 6th, 2008 at 5:53 am 11

@Borelioza.
I found it in coupla forwards that landed in my Inbox. I think they are pretty common mails doing the rounds on the Internet.
Randki January 9th, 2008 at 1:34 am 12

Hi,
I would suggest to send this text within the forwarded spam-mail to the webmasters, administrative contacts,?and registrars of each spam-promoted website!
monitorin March 1st, 2008 at 1:22 pm 13

You’ve wrote it yourself :D? hehe Really funny